Interview with a Former Taiyoukai Sort of
by DemonQueen17
Summary: I had to poke fun at the fact that Inuyasha's father doesn't have an official name in the 3rd movie. Selfinsertion. Hope you enjoy.


Disclaimer: _Inuyasha_ and its characters are not mine; enough said.

Note: I couldn't help but write this short bit, poking fun at the fact that Inuyasha's father doesn't actually have a name. It is a self-insertion and pure fiction. So, here it is.

Interview with a Former Taiyoukai (If You Want to Call it That)

This totally sucks. I look up a website dedicated to anime in general to find the official name of Inuyasha's father. There was a name there. However, it turned out not to be his 'official' name. It was yet another rumor.

Damn, I can't believe I got tripped up over a rumor. Then I start to wonder if he actually has a name. I figure everyone does. You can't call somebody "Hey you". So I decided to go to the source, in the afterlife. I don't know how I ended up there of all places, but it didn't matter. I wanted to know for sure.

There he was; he's a lot bigger than I thought. The Inu no Taisho himself; this is so cool. And he does outdo Sesshomaru in the looks department; beautiful amber eyes, cute elfin ears, flowing silver hair in a ponytail and a killer body. At least he's not wearing that bulky armor. I couldn't help but be a bit nervous and give a little bow. He looks so serious. Then he smiles and speaks in a very deep voice, deeper than Sesshomaru. I'm sure he could sense my nervousness.

"You don't have to be nervous or formal. I have lost count of how many people have come to visit me here. Let me guess; you've come to ask me about my true name. Please, have a seat."

His voice is enough to send chills down my spine. Come on, he's a married youkai and many times older; well, at least he was when was alive. "Yeah, how did you know?"

"It was the true purpose of anyone who's come here before you. And I will say to you what I've said to everyone else. I'm not telling you my name."

This is going to be harder than I thought. "Well, the thing is everyone refers to you as either Inu-papa, Inutaisho, Inu no Taisho, Papa or Oyaji by Inuyasha, and many other names, depending on who you ask. Are you all right with the fact that people make up names for you, especially when they write fanfiction?"

"I don't have a problem with it. I'm actually flattered by this. However, I'm not spilling."

Damn, I have to take drastic measures. "You wouldn't do it for a doggie biscuit? They're MilkBones ™." Don't ask how they got here. I had to keep them in handy, though I don't have a dog. I got the idea from a website I've been frequenting lately.

That got his attention. Every time I would move my hand holding the biscuit, he would focus his attention on it. This is interesting. It's actually working. I'm mentally giggling at this. A few seconds later, my hand is empty. Damn, he's fast.

"Oh, that was delicious. Do you have any more?"

"Sure, I have a whole box of them. Enjoy." I never would have thought that this powerful youkai could be such a puppy when he wants to be. "So, are you going to tell me your name?" I listen in close, thinking he's going to spill the beans.

"Mmmm….nope." Is he kidding me? I can't give up yet. I wonder if this would work with the great Inuyoukai. It worked on Inuyasha.

"Not even for some ramen?" Please let this work.

I could tell his ears perked up the mention of ramen. "Did you just say ramen?"

"Yep, is beef-flavored ok? It doesn't take long for me to make it."

"The kitchen is to your left." Was he drooling? Who would have thought dead youkai had their own living space? Anyway, I need to get this ramen started. A few moments later, the ramen was ready.

At the table, he had some chopsticks at the ready. Next thing, you know, he's gobbling at the ramen.

"This is a most unusual type of ramen. Nevertheless, it was delicious. I thank you. Forgive me, but I'm not telling you my name."

I bang my head against the table. Make that strike two. I was curious as to why. "Why not? It's not a forbidden name, is it?"

"Of course not. Not even Izayoi knew my name."

"You're kidding, right? Then what did she call you?"

"She called me 'husband' or 'darling'. And no, I'm not kidding." He looked a little closer at me. What is he staring at? "I never noticed it before. You have the eyes of a cat youkai. But you're human. How is that possible?"

He is so avoiding the subject. "I'm not Japanese as you can see. My family comes from a Caribbean island called Haiti. I have several relatives with eyes like mine."

"This is interesting. Do they all look like you?"

"No, the skin tone and eye color varies." I have to remember what I came for. "Look, Taisho-sama, the focus isn't on me. I just have to know your name. Can you please tell me?"

The Inu no Taisho sighed. "Very well. Since you were nice enough to give these wonderful treats, I'll tell you. But you must promise not to tell anyone." Little did I know, he probably had something up his sleeve.

He leaned over towards my ear and whispers something, getting my hopes up. It sounded like Japanese. "What was that? Could you speak up?"

The former taiyoukai sits back in his seat. "And that is all I have to say concerning my name."

"What did you say anyway?"

"Translation: I'll never tell." He then laughs a little. "You know, of all those who have come here, you have been the most creative. Anything else you'd like to try?"

"I'm not sure yet. Thanks for the compliment." The ramen didn't work. The MilkBones™ definitely didn't work. Hmm, getting him drunk…not going to try it. That might take a while. I don't have as much time as those in the afterlife. I need to try a different tactic. Then it came to me. I looked down at his claws.

"Has anyone ever told you have nails or claws in your case that a lot of human females would kill for?"

"I don't believe so. I'm flattered. However, it's not going to work. I will not be complimented into giving you my name, young lady."

"What did your parents call you?"

"By my name, of course."

"And?"

"I'm not telling you." This is frustrating. He's a tough nut to crack, but has his puppy-dog moments. I wonder if those ears are sensitive. It's a good thing his hair's in a ponytail. I get easy access.

So, I stand up and move towards him. I could tell he's a bit suspicious. How can anyone resist those ears anyway? I wonder what kind of reaction I would get if I rub them.

"What do you plan on doing?"

I say nothing. He's getting increasingly suspicious. I hear a gasp as I begin to rub his ears. Then I hear a whine. A whine? This had better work. I tried food, compliments, doggie treats, and the direct approach. None of them worked.

Is it working? I then hear a purr. Soon, I hear a soft…snore? "Mmm, that feels wonderful. Keep going."

I bend down to whisper as I continue to rub his ears. "You like that, huh?"

"Mmm hmm." He leans back against my body. This will be my last chance to get his name. The ear-rub must have a hypnotic effect on him.

"Now, I want you to tell me your name."

"Mmm…my name…"

"That's right; your name."

"My name…is…"

Come on, you crazy dog, spill it.

"…a secret. Thanks for the ear-rub." Damn it, I should have tried to get him drunk. I finally give up.

I tried everything I could think of, but to no avail. Oh well, them's the breaks. "Damn, I see where Sesshomaru gets his toughness from. It's clear that you're not going to give out your name. Besides, I have to get going. All in all, it's been a pleasure and honor to meet you."

"It's been fun. I hope we can meet again sometime."

"I hope so, too." Then everything goes black. And I wake up. It was all a dream. I couldn't believe it. But it was one hell of a dream. I yawn and stretch. That was a nice nap I had. I go to my laptop and check my e-mail. The first message I come across is a strange one from an e-mail address I've never seen before. The subject title was 'Open Me'. Do I open it or delete it? Well, it doesn't hurt to take a peek.

My eyes grow wide as I read it. I guess it wasn't a dream after all. It read:

To my most entertaining guest,

I thank you for such a wonderful visit. No one has ever done what you have done to try and get my true name. Sadly, you have failed like many others. The MilkBones™ and the ramen were quite delicious. And the ear-rub was most relaxing. I must admit that you almost got me to spill. No one has ever rubbed my ears before, not even Izayoi.

You must be wondering how I came across your e-mail address. I've come across many websites related to this fanfiction you've mentioned. There is internet in the afterlife after all. I surf the web frequently when I'm not thrashing Ryukotsusei. You would not want to meet him up close. He can be very cranky.

Anyway, I've enjoyed the time we've had. I look forward to hearing from you. By the way, you have such beautiful eyes for a human.

Thank you again,

Inu no Taisho

P.S. I'm still not telling you my name. :)

I smile as I read the message. It was nice of him to write back. I decide to put his address among my stored contacts. I definitely plan to write him back. He's the coolest youkai ever. Off to dinner. Thanks, Inu no Taisho.

End

_I had to do this. This just came to me. I hope you enjoy this. Later. _


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